Sleepless in Palo Alto

The mind is so busy. Darting from issue to issue like a hummingbird constantly feeding itself. Such busy-ness. Work. Cycling. Elul. High Holy Day preparations. Forgiveness.

I wonder why I have been writing so little of late. Sometimes that part of me goes dormant, and when I become aware of it I realize that an important part of my mental, emotional, and spiritual well-being is absent. Interesting that this is occurring during a period of intense physical focus. Perhaps there is an involuntary balancing of fields of energy that moves the flow from one domain to the other. I’m not really buying that, but it’s a thought.

Recently I have been pouring a great deal of intellectual and creative energy into solving issues at work. Consciously, intentionally, or not it seems I have taken on the mantel of driving the firm to meet our corporate commitment to develop a corps of 200 professionals who have achieved accreditation in the field of sustainability this year. Not that it is even in my control. Not that I can take all the credit for this accomplishment should it come to pass (and it looks pretty good that it will). Nonetheless, as sustainability learning leader, I am certainly focusing more of my attention on supporting this effort than anyone else. It is a rewarding task just for the reasons implicit in the preceding statement. Where I can directly support people pursuing the accreditation it is very satisfying. And where I learn of those who accomplish this distinction without my involvement--these discoveries are delightful too.

I am also getting to a point in the design of a new course on sustainable real estate operations where the pieces are finally pulling together in a coherent way. This is a phase in the design process that has moved me from a state of anguished searching to blissful arrival ever since I was in architecture school lo those many years ago. It’s a little like this pre-dawn hour. All is dark. I am alone with my thoughts and struggles. Sometimes I lose sight of the fact that the dawn will rise today as it has through the ages. And when it does--what a joy!

The bike thing has pieces of that. A lot of it is physical. I won’t list all the places where my body is in that state of anguished searching. But they are there. My sessions with my cycling coach are a real mixture of pain and pleasure, with the emphasis on the former. As I look down at my aching thighs propelling the pedals relentlessly, counting the minutes and seconds toward the completion of my exercise, I try to convince myself that I will reap the rewards when I pedal across the desert in just a few weeks. Tune in later for that chapter--I hope.